In my ecstasy
let me live
upon my hard wood mattress
may my body rest
while i count the stars
that i may not see
i shall then
all those carpenters forgive.
on the seesaw of sorrow
let me play
while i slide down
the banister of life
as much of dismay
i shall forgive your blows
even if in so
i am sent to slay.
upon the trees of a desert land
where a thousand cactus can only grow
let me jump from tree to tree
as i dream of a green grass land
which seems to be from doom so free.
it is then
that i shall forgive this land of thee'
where a thousand errors are noted on me.
19 comments:
Amen!
Some Perceptions do mstch!
Killer of a poem! Liked this one a lot! More than anything I have read on your place. Hope you continue on this rich vein and dish out more of these....
What's in a name:
thanks ya!
this is something i wrote 2-3 weeks back. i have two/three more. i wrote those while i was in the same mood.hope u like em too.
errors noted on thee...
the thing is that freedom in a realistic or existential manner is quite an enticing concept and so is pain...
and help me out with this... whats a bannister of life?
Rocking.......You touched my soul........
Tugga(http://travelogueworthtwocents.blogspot.com/)
Glorious is what i can say!
peace & love
Jeevy
what a beautiful prayer =)
checking out ur blog after a really long time.
nice one. really strong.
imagine school children singing this out in the morning assembly..pure killer dat'd be :P
this is too beautiful to be left unanswered.
seraphic girl, it leaves me petrified... no false words here. just the lameness of a spiritual silence..
beautiful poem, beautiful...utterly..am speechless.
beautiful. :)
and among these lines of yours..
let me tremble and weep..
for heart's enriched with bliss,
never stops to reap.
ah..feels blessed.
i shall forgive your blows
even if in so
i am sent to slay.
that says it all!!!
all i wanna say is that it's as b'ful as Thee!
one of ur most appealing one...
i m just moving with it...:)
i shall forgive your blows
even if in so
i am sent to slay.
but will it b justified..altruistic approach mademoiselle
pricky:
a bannister of life, is your support, something which can be seen as one's helping hand,power and so on and so forth. but at the same time, the same thing "may" help you go the other way-slide down too.
so banister of life may be different things to diff people.
tugga:
thank you so much. ill visit your blog and add you asap.
Rajeev:
im glad you liked it :)
sophiagurl:
thank you :)
oblique-skeptic:
lol. yeah that would be a killer. but i hope they dont have to pray this way.
crimsonflaw:
thanks a lot :D
purple deepens:
thanks gal!
jeya anand:
glad!
sach:
:)
Dream catcher:
justified or not, thats just the way it is.
Wow, have you gone to Wirter's Island?
This is great! Ask posion coated elixer for info or dewyknicker site.
lovebd
What a fantastic read! I gasped at the closing words. Whew! Wow.
Quite frankly, I was touched. I browse many blogs of so-called poets and have yet to find something so unique, unstylized and flowing. I loved the image of the wooden matress and the carpenters. Excellent.
And amen to that!
thank you
i especially like "seesaws of sorrow" - for its alliterative quality and the truth of the idea
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